Congratulations! You met with your lawyer, crafted tailored legal documents for your estate plan and signed everything.  You have a solid plan in place. Now what?  Clients often ask me at our document execution ceremony if they should tell anyone about their plan, who needs copies of documents and where to keep their plan.

Should you tell anyone about your plan?

Yes – do not keep your plan a secret.  In order for your family to be able to help you with medical or financial decisions, they need to know that you have the proper legal documents in place. Talking about your plan can be a very emotional experience, but it an important conversation. Be prepared to explain why you chose a certain person to be your Medical Power of Attorney and another to be the Executor. If you are not treating all children the same as beneficiaries, it would be helpful to explain your rationale, so you can address any confusion.

Who should receive copies of your documents?

The primary documents that should be shared are your Medical Directives. Do give copies of your Medical Power of Attorney, HIPAA release and Advanced Directive (Living Will) to your doctors to let them know your wishes and also to whom they should communicate. You should also give copies of these medical forms to the persons you have chosen to advocate for you. It may  be a good idea to give a copy of your Durable Power of Attorney to the person you have listed, especially if you believe they will be serving on your behalf in the near term. Copies of Wills do not need to be distributed, but you should notify your Executor of the location of your legal documents. In addition, if you have young children, advise the person named as the guardian the location of the Will and the contact information of the Executor.

Where should you keep your Estate Plan documents?

We strongly recommend that you NOT store your originals in a safety deposit box as that often makes them difficult to access when they’re needed. Otherwise, there is no wrong location. The most common places our clients have kept their documents are:

• In-home safe
• Filing Cabinet
• Bookshelf
• Closet
• Under the bed
• Desk drawer
• Coffee table

After you have chosen a secure spot for your documents, please also keep the electronic copies in a safe place.  Many clients like to share these files to their cloud storage and some will also send copies to the agents named in their legal documents.  No matter where you choose to keep your documents, please tell your lawyer, your Executor and your family where they will be stored.  The worst thing you can do is hide them away and not tell anyone- no plan can help you if the document cannot be found.

Assisting Parents With Estate Planning

We are fortunate to have many multigenerational clients. The most successful families have ensured estate plans were in place for themselves, their parents and even their young adult children.

While it can be challenging to talk to your parents about estate planning, it is crucial to make sure they have the legal documents in place to cover scenarios where they may be in an accident, need you to step in as a financial advocate (Durable Power of Attorney), medical advocate (Medical Power of Attorney), execute their Wills or to carry out their burial or cremation instructions (Appointment for Disposition of Remains).

If your parents do not have Wills, Powers of Attorney or Medical Directives in place, it is helpful to talk to them about why they are important so that you can assist them (and they can assist each other!) in the event of an accident or death.

First, a Durable Power of Attorney gives someone the authority to act on your behalf in financial and personal decision making. Your parents can list each other as primary, but should have at least one backup person in place. The best person to be Power of Attorney is someone that is trustworthy, detail-oriented and does not have their own financial issues.

Next, your parents should have what we call the “medical trio” in place. This means naming someone as Medical Power of Attorney – their advocate to make health care decisions for them if they are not able to do so. Because we want those decisions to be informed, the persons listed as Medical Power of Attorney should also be given HIPAA authorization (access to medical records). The final medical decision to discuss is your parents’ wishes regarding use of life support (Advanced Directive or Living Will).

Talk to your parents about having a Will (or Revocable Trust) plan in place, naming an Executor (or Trustee) to carry out the instructions in the Will (or Trust). The Executor, like the Durable Power of Attorney, is a trustworthy individual who is detail oriented and capable of working with the probate attorney to follow the deadlines set by the Court.

Finally, talk to them about their wishes regarding burial or cremation. Did they already pre-arrange with a funeral home?  Do they want to be cremated? Is there a certain place they want to be buried or their ashes scattered? All of these decisions should be discussed ahead of time and they should name someone (Appointment of Agent for Disposition of Remains) to make sure these wishes are carried out.

This may be a difficult conversation to have with your parents. Make sure they understand that you love them, you honor them, and they need to help you so you can make sure all of their wishes are carried out. In addition to getting the legal documents in place as outlined above, work with them to make a list of their assets and liabilities. Make sure you know what policies they have (including any long-term care policies), financial information, passwords, and where things such as their deeds, titles and legal documents are located.  With a little bit of planning, you and your parents can have peace of mind having thoughtfully planned for their future.